Thoughts That Come And Go

 

Thoughts That Come And Go

 

Hillel	Trump	Anyone Else
If I am not for me, who will be?	I am for me …	Family, friends, free people
If I am only for me, what am I?	It is who I am …	A selfish bigot
If not now, when?	Me first … always …	Yesterday

 

My get up and go moved to Bali about five years ago … unfortunately, my body was left behind…

My brother used to say that the history of humankind could be told as the history of war … of course he was right but my personal understanding is that the history could also be told as the history of self-interest starting with that first apple and all those who not only followed the money but grabbed as much as they could for themselves along the way …

We are born innocent … few remain in that pristine state …

Where was I when the mountains were formed … “a pair of ragged claws scuttling across the floors of silent seas” …

How does hatred develop?

Why are we suspicious of those who seem different from us?

Is there balm in Gilead? Tell me, tell, I implore. Quoth the raven … nevermore.

Who would win a debate between DJT and Abou Ben Adhem?

Which comes first – self-awareness, self-interest, greed, ego-mania? Which comes last? Which can last?

Why can I not stop these thoughts from trickling out? I bite my fingernails but not my fingers … ouch.

Who am I? Someone who denies facts? Denies elections? Who admits to doing no wrong? Admits to limited knowledge? Admits to being all too human? I once got lost in a large department store? I am still lost … no direction-home-finder.

When I was thirteen, I read these words in front of the congregation … comfort ye, comfort ye, my people, saith the lord … well, I read them in Hebrew … na-hamu, na-hamu, ahmee, omar el-lo-hay-hem … of course with a Southern accent and four part harmony …

My professor asked, after discussing and dismissing the notion of substance as what properties got stuck in, what is love? I said it was what people got stuck in and others laughed … he said he thought it was the glue that binds us together … no one laughed …

What do I know about learning, technology and teaching? Not a lot … nearly everyone else in this department and other similar places knows a lot more about such things … I just try to ask questions and search for answers and tidbits of meaning … crumbs are what I usually find … old and forgotten crumbs … perhaps remnants of a big bang long ago … crumbs in a crumbling world … in the beginning there was chaos and the void and not much has changed since … just more stuff for a privileged few … more stuff and less substance …

I know so little yet I wanted to know so much … what has happened along that wayward path? Many a friend has come and gone and I am left with one hand waving free … the other hand pounding on a keyboard … it is all I know how to do …

Mike Spector

October 2022